'If it were done when 'tis done, then 'twere well, It were done quickly' - Macbeth (Scotsman), William Shakespeare (Englishman) Team GB is getting ridiculous. The prospect of Britain fielding a football team at the 2012 Olympics should have been something to celebrate after years of absence. Instead it is fast becoming an almighty calamity. For years, I watched in envy as other nations played soccer in the Olympics, but it was never a huge loss for us to be left out. Now we have finally been invited to (our own) party, we are umming and erring so much we might not even end up going. There are two immovable obstacles at the heart of the current furor, which shows no signs of abating. One is that the UK is four nations in one and those four nations are the oldest football associations in the world, with privileged seats on FIFA’s International Board but in danger of disappearing if enough FIFA nations choose to dissolve them into a UK team. And second is that the UK has no choice but to host an Olympics football tournament in four years. Plus, FIFA President Sepp Blatter does not have the right to veto congress decisions, and in any case is equivocating and fudging the issue instead of showing a clear lead. To complicate matters further, Scottish Nationalists are the largest party in the Edinburgh parliament at the moment and plan an independence vote two years before the Games. What a mess. Try explaining this situation to anyone from outside the UK and you are met by baffled looks. Most Europeans irritatingly use ‘English’ to mean anyone from the UK or even the British Isles. Oddly enough, Americans are more on the ball when it comes to using the right adjective, perhaps because of their diverse origins. I once found myself on the wrong end of a Welsh fist in Cardiff for the crime of having an English accent, and twice in Britain, once at Hampden Park for Scotland v England and once at the Millennium Stadium for Wales v Northern Ireland, have I witnessed the British national anthem deafeningly booed. This is four nations, not one, when push comes to shove. So if there is a solution, it is in a political division which would end the football arguments once and for all. But given this is unlikely to happen by 2012, we are left with an insoluble conundrum. However funny it is to see the Tartan Army in a tizzy, their fears are not to be sniffed at. Four votes is not enough to stave off an African rebellion in FIFA corridors. If we just made our excuses and left before the Games begin that might solve the problem, but refusing to enter a team will also look silly given the tournament is to be staged in Britain. Will Wembley sell out without a GB eleven? And will the IOC not want a GB team there given football normally attracts huge crowds at the Games. Nobody seems to have mentioned their wishes in this debate. And how many international competitions can you recall which did not have a host nation? And since this is the homeland of the sport, there really must be some sort of British team competing. So what the heck do we do? A playoff between the four home nations’ U23 teams could allow one to represent Team GB and still stay under FIFA’s umbrella, but this just seems too far-fetched a possibility. However sensible it might seem, I just cannot see it happening. The Celtic FAs are already dead set against anything ‘GB’ but it might be worth a shot trying to persuade them. The best the Northern Irish, Scottish and Welsh FAs can realistically do therefore, is continue to refuse to participate and voice their opposition as shrilly as they can. That also means they insist that Cardiff and Glasgow are not used as venues for the football as planned. What games there are must take place in England alone and Team GB must be made up of only English players, like it was when we used to enter a team and no-one cared a hoot. If that means the fans sing ‘Ing-ger-land’ and wave St George’s Crosses, all well and good: That will help the Celts’ cause. But an all-English team singing ‘God Save the Queen’ in Scotland or Wales??? P-lease! Maybe only when the rest of the world sees British people booing the British anthem and cheering another country against 'Team GB' would they understand what this is all about. When London 2012 is over and Team GB has lost to Croatia or on penalties to Germany, then we can all go back to watching the Olympic football on television like we used to and forget about this unprecedented hullabaloo over what should be a simple matter of the hosts fielding a team. Whatever we decide to do, please let's get it over with. "Lord grant that Marshal Wade, May by thy mighty aid, Victory bring. May he sedition hush, And like a torrent rush, Rebellious Scots to crush. God save the Queen!" (c) Sean O'Conor & Soccerphile Bet with Bet 365 World Soccer News Soccer betting tips Soccer Books & DVDs Tags Soccer News soccer football J-League K-League Betting

Results 10th June: Spain 4:1 Russia (Villa 20' 45' 75', Pavluchenko 86', Fabregas 90'), Innsbruck Sweden 2:0 Greece (Ibrahimovic 67', Hansson 73'), Salzburg Now we have seen all the teams, what have we learnt so far? Ibrahimovic's golazo against Greece was the most spectacular goal, Spain's 4-1 torching of Russia the most alluring and the Dutch's 3-0 thumping of Italy the stand-out result of the first slew of games. Fears that the Oranje would miss Arjen Robben proved groundless as they trounced the World Champions, defeating the Azzurri for the first time since Nottingham Forest were last crowned English champions. Italy has been awash with soul-searching today after such a clamorous capitulation. Italian back fours are supposed to be as compact as ranks of Roman legionary, not crumble like old Garibaldi biscuits left in the tin for too long. In midfield and attack too, the azure blues were decidedly off-colour as the Dutch sailed past them time and again, bagging three goals when it could have been more. All of a sudden, the in-vogue formation of 4-1-4-1 looked rather ropey. How fortunes change. Marco Van Basten is once again the Netherlands' poster boy after serious doubts were raised following his team's heavy weather in qualifying, while the blissful memory of the World Cup triumph in Germany has begun to fade. My suspicion is the Dutch are yet to prove they can be consistent so let us not get carried away. Remember how the Dutch steamrollered Yugoslavia 6-1 in the Euro 2000 quarter-final before grinding to a 0-0 draw and defeat on penalties against Italy in the semi-final. More recently, they began the 2006 World Cup at a canter, dispatching Serbia 6-0 in the first round before succumbing dismally 1-0 to Portugal in an ill-tempered game that produced four red cards and eight yellow cards. It was a Dutchman who coined the phrase 'sexy football' but it wasn't his countrymen playing the hottest soccer so far in the Alps. That award goes to Spain, who followed a stop-start 1-0 win over the USA in their final preparation match with a 4-1 mutilation of Russia and Guus Hiddink. How much should we read into Spain's deliciously simple pass and move soccer I am not sure. Russia were rubber in defence and, here comes my two cents, I could not imagine England being so outplayed had they qualified in place of them. Russia, let us not forget, were woeful 3-0 losers at Wembley in qualifying and also lost away to Israel, only scraping into the finals courtesy of England's self-destruction at home to Croatia in their final game. Guus Hiddink may be one of the world's top coaches, but his CV looked creased after Spain had finished with his latest team. Other sidesvmaking up the numbers are Poland and Turkey, who were utterly insipid losing to Portugal. And Greece, you might say, but I shall defend Otto Rehagel's team for providing some welcome entertainment. The sight of the Salzburg arena booing and whistling the Greeks for their negative play was wonderful theatre. Yes, we all want to be entertained and God forbid every team played like Greece, but I have a sneaking admiration for a team who managed to win Euro 2004 without any flair and who have the gall to turn up four years later with the same coach and same tactics! Plus we like to boo the baddie. The Czechs and French have yet to convince me while Sweden and Croatia's victories confirmed they will be tough nuts for any team to crack. Romania have yet to show what they are about, if anything while of the twin hosts, Switzerland could yet make it to the second round if results go their way. After, Holland, Portugal and Spain, the fourth and last team in the A-League thus far is of course Germany, who looked a much improved and more confident team than two years ago. That the Germans could be on the road to another final is demoralising on the one hand, but only to be expected on the other. There will be tougher tests than Poland ahead for Joachim Low's side, but there was an inescapable feeling during that game that we have been down this familiar road many times before. (c) Sean O'Conor & Soccerphile Bet with Bet 365 World Soccer News Soccer betting tips Soccer Books & DVDs Tags Soccer News soccer football J-League K-League Betting

EURO 2008: Netherlands 3:0 Italy (Van Nistelrooy 26', Sneijder 31', Van Bronckhorst 79' ), Stade de Suisse/Wankdorf, Bern Now hands up who predicted that scoreline? 'As a finishing touch, God created the Dutch' said a fan's t-shirt in Berne. And I wondered how much the hand of the divine was behind last night's lightning bolt of a scoreline at the Wankdorf. While not quite another 'Miracle of Bern', there was something magical about watching the world champions getting clubbed 3-0. There is also nothing like seeing football 'experts' get it so wrong. The 2002 World Cup could not be bettered for shock after shock, but Greece's win in Euro 2004 was also wonderfully unforeseeable. As we remind the Premier League ad nauseam, football needs to have that umpredictability factor for it to thrive. I was all about to pen a piece about the soccer gods punishing Italy for y ears of gamesmanship with some dodgy refereeing before, a) I remembered that already happend six years ago when Ecuadorian funny-man/referee Byron Moreno orchestrated a 2-1 win for South Korea over the Azzurri at the World Cup (though Italy also had themselves to blame that day to be fair), and, b) The half-time professors concluded that the goal was good because Gianluigi Buffon had pushed Christian Panucci off the field in the same movement which produced the strike. Confused? I am. I thought staying over the line was a classic way to play the opposition offside or your teamate on. If so, then our initial reaction was correct: that Ruud Van Nistelrooy was a country mile offside when he tapped in Wesley Sneijder's drive in the 27th minute. I'm not the only one. None other than Roberto Donadoni, Milan and Italy legend and current Azzurri coach, told Italian TV after the game that he thought it was clearly off. Italy, the soccer nation neutrals love to hate (Perche? Catenaccio, br ibing refs, Berlusconi, Materazzi...), paid for the Christian Vieri dive which helped eliminate Australia in World Cup 2006, as well as Marco Materazzi's foul-mouthed gamesmanship which saw Zinedine Zidane sent off in the final. Yes it was cruel, but we cannot blame Van Nistelrooy, even though he has been known to fool linesmen before. When he scored tonight he turned immediately to the linesman after netting and ran away convinced he was onside. The same striker also stayed on his feet minutes earlier when Buffon made contact with him in the area, upsetting his stride. I can't imagine an Italian player doing the same. That is the difference between Italy and the Netherlands at football. The Dutch play clean and foul clean too. Compare the card fest of blatant fouls and dissent Holland served up at the last World Cup with the Italian 'furbizia' (craftiness) which lets get away with it so often. If you were in any doubt, watch Materazzi's foul on the raiding Dirk Kuyt around the half hour mark in slow motion. Materazzi had nothing in his body language to suggest he was playing irreguarly, but he stealthily tapped Kuyt's right foot with his as he sped past, forcing the Liverpool man to lose his footing almost imperceptibly. The Italians are experts at shirt-tugging, niggling and upsetting their opponents and in 2006 escaped unpunished too much for their eventual victory to shine. The Italians cannot complain on the night anyway as the Netherlands had dominated the game before taking the lead against an anaemic Italy. There was nothing wrong with the Dutch's second goal in the 31st minute, which came only seconds after Giovanni Van Bronckhorst had cleared off his own line. Wesley Sneider's volley past Buffon was almost as surreal as his team's sky blue socks. Could the World Champions really be 2-0 down and so hopelessly on the ropes? Had the Italians' world-class goalkeeper not shown his class ten minutes lat er as Van Nistelrooy bore down on him, it would surely have been 3-0 Netherlands at the break. When Gianluca Zambrotta turned Van Bronckhorst's header past Buffon with eleven minutes to go, the karma was in full flow. Ok, enough Italy-bashing. I have always liked Roberto Donadoni and will feel sorry for him if this costs him his position, which despite his recent contract extension, has been hanging like a thread and rumored to be in its final days for some months. The Italians came back into the game after Alessandro Del Piero, enjoying an Indian summer, came on in the 64th minute to provide a roaming threat to the Dutch's d efence. A multi-man move in the 70th minute proved how good the Italians are and how they should not be written off yet. The Azzurri are traditionally slow-starters to tournaments and so it proved once more. But the world champions are far from beaten. In 1994 they lost their opening World Cup game to Ireland but then reached the final, which they only lost on penalties. The Netherlands had not beaten the Azzurri for 30 years before the match but before long, it seemed there was only going to be one winner on the night. Italy were just not at the races, as if they were pre-programmed to start tournaments slowly. While the 57 million national team coaches in Italy have begun throwing tomatoes, or should that be oranges, the Italy-bashers should beware. The siege mentality worked in their favour in 1982 and 2006, and they have two games left in which to perform. ... Not understanding Schweizer-Deutsch enough and not wishing to be bored by the French-Swiss commentating team, I watched the game on Italian-speaking Swiss TV. This was a whole lot better than the interminable post-game analysis on RAI, which lost me in its byzantine detail from irritating pundits, self-proclaimed soccer-boffins who almost sent me to sleep before I could hit the off button. You might think England is a football-loving country, but there is nowhere in Europe, with the possible exception of Spain's daily 'AS', which can hold a candle to the minutiae, the obsessive clinical dissection of the game, as practised in Italy. ... The Swiss reaction to their 1-0 loss to the Czechs could have come straight out of Fleet Street. A picture of Czech defender Tomas Ujfalusi handling the ball was splashed across the front pages of the local rags - 'Hands off our cup!' bleated the headline. Meanwhile, in another English parallel, the more cerebral side of the debate has centred around the preponderance of foreigners in the domestic game, which they have belatedly realised is hurting the Swiss national team on its big day at Euro 2008. (c) Sean O'Conor & Soccerphile Bet with Bet 365 World Soccer News Soccer betting tips Soccer Books & DVDs Tags Soccer News soccer football J-League K-League Betting

Andy Greeves I’ve never been the most patient of individuals and on the eve of watching Tottenham Hotspur in their first cup final in six years, frankly, I’m a mess. I’ve often heard footballers talk about how they can’t sleep the night before a big match, or how the preparation for a game is much harder than actually playing. It’s the same for us fans. Ever since the final whistle sounded at White Hart Lane on Tuesday 22 January, the night we beat Arsenal 5-1 in the League Cup semi final, second leg, my mind has been focused on nothing other than Sunday’s final. I’ll take this opportunity to apologise to my girlfriend, my family, work colleagues and friends, who have had to endure my hyperactivity and constant cup final talk ever since. While fans of Chelsea, Arsenal, Liverpool and Manchester United are all to used to playing regularly in cup finals in recent years, for Spurs supporters, it’s a far rarer experience. Especially for the younger generation of Lilywhites, who have been brought up on the tales of the double side of ‘61, the great European nights and FA Cup triumphs, yet never experienced such success for themselves. Spurs competed in just two finals in the nineties and including Sunday, have managed only a further two in the 21st century. For that reason alone, I think my hysteria ahead of the showdown with Chelsea is fully justified. Football supporters often assimilate events in their own lives with that of their team. They can remember a certain year on the basis of what kit they were wearing that season or where they finished in the league. I’m the same and in the run up to the Carling Cup Final, I can help but indulge in some shameless nostalgia. My first Spurs final was nine years ago, when we beat Leicester City 1-0 at Wembley. The game was far from a classic and my predominant memories of the match itself are of Justin Edinburgh’s sending off for striking (or should that be stroking!) Robbie Savage’s hair and Allan Nielsen diving to head a stoppage time winner. Moreover, I remember the excitement in the build up to the match, seeing Wembley for the first time and jumping up and down with my dad when we scored. Sol Campbell captained the side that day and who would have thought at the time that, just two years later, he would be turning out for Arsenal instead. I’ve avoided watching too many replays of that game as the sight of Campbell holding the League Cup aloft in a Spurs shirt angers me, in light of his subsequent defection. Back in 1999, I studying for my GCSE’s, I had massive crush on Britney Spears and thought my brick-sized Nokia 5510 mobile was the best thing since sliced bread. I was using fake ID to get into clubs, had a particularly shocking haircut, encrusted in five layers of wet look gel and unsurprisingly, I hadn’t really had a proper girlfriend. My one true love was Tottenham Hotspur and having started going to games at the beginning of the 90’s, I was already completely hooked by this date. My bedroom was covered in posters, I had a Spurs rug, lamp, bedspread, curtains… the list is endless. David Ginola was my idol and I’ll never forget watching him. One of the most natural footballers you could ever hope to see and a man who could bring life into the most ordinary of matches. To this day, the Frenchman probably rates as my favorite Spur, despite having also seen the likes of Lineker, Sheringham, Gascoigne and Berbatov ply their trade in the famous Lilywhite shirt. By our next cup final appearance in 2002, things were a little different for both myself and Spurs. I was in my first year of university, handily enough in Cardiff, where the Worthington Cup Final against Blackburn Rovers would played. Glenn Hoddle was still enjoying a honeymoon period as manager of his beloved Tottenham Hotspur and in the semi-finals, we had delightfully beaten Chelsea 6-3 on aggregate. Having a cup final involving Spurs play in Cardiff in my first year their as a student seemed like fate. I could see the Millennium Stadium from the pitches I played football on in university and I lived just a 15 minute walk from town. As soon as we beat Chelsea in the semi-finals, up went the scarves and balloons in my student halls of residence. However, my build up to the big game was far from ideal, when a friend of mine delayed in posting our application for final tickets, ultimately meaning we would miss out. To say I was annoyed with my ‘friend’ is an understatement, in fact I’ve hardly spoken to him ever since. From the feeling of total jubilation I had experienced only a few weeks earlier, when I was at the Lane to see us beat Chelsea 5-1 in the semi-final, second leg, I now had to resign myself to the fact I wasn’t going to the match. I cut a sombre figure, happy for my team, but ultimately devastated that I wouldn’t be at the Millennium Stadium. My friends, all supporters of other teams, cheered me up by offering to come and watch the game in a pub near the ground. They all promised to be Spurs fans for the day, despite their allegiances with the likes of Oldham Athletic, Bristol City and Sheffield Wednesday. So the Sunday came, I donned my Spurs shirt and bought a programme as if I were heading to the match. I also brought a sign I had written with me which pleaded for a spare ticket and I had £150 in my wallet which I was prepared to part with to get in. I spoke to various touts who wanted £500-600 for one ticket, including Spurs season ticket holders and members that had travelled all the way to Cardiff, just to make a profit rather than go the game themselves. I was sickened by these individuals and despite the fact I wanted to go to the match more than anything, refused to negotiate with these types of characters. Just as the game was about to kick off, a man approached me offering me a ticket in the Spurs end for £150. I bartered with him and got the price down to £120, at which point I swapped cash for ticket and dashed into the ground. I feel immense sympathy for the thousands of supporters that have missed out on tickets for this Sunday’s game, because nobody should have to pay over the odds to see their team, especially when it is their own so-called ‘fans’ that are ripping them off. Unfortunately, people with a similar attitude as mine will always be part of the problem, in that they will pay what it takes to see their team in a cup final, through love for their team. After all the stress of getting a ticket, the match proved to be highly disappointing for me and the 30,000 odd Spurs fans that had made the journey to Cardiff. Blackburn won, what was a highly entertaining match, by two goals to one. But having been overriding favourites going into the final, this seemed and ultimately proved to be yet another false dawn for our long suffering supporters. It was also the beginning of the end for legendary players like Teddy Sheringham and Darren Anderton. Despite playing on to this day, the 2002 Worthington Cup Final was their last chance to win something for Tottenham Hotspur, having playing nearly 600 games for the north London club between them in their career. It was also my last opportunity to see Spurs play in Cardiff while living there, as I headed off to London upon graduating three years later. So for myself, the team and all our great supporters, Sunday’s game is absolutely massive. The front of the official match day programme for the final reads, ‘For today, nothing else matters’. That just about sums it up. I’m preparing for the big day as if it were a wedding. My specially embroidered cup final shirt and scarf have been hanging outside my wardrobe for over a week now and my choice of jeans, footwear and pants has been planned with similar detail. It’s the first final I’ve experienced Spurs going into the game as underdogs., yet ironically, this is by far and away a better Tottenham team than graced the 1999 or 2002 games. It will be time for me to stop the nostalgia as I step out of my door on Sunday, for then, my focus will be entirely on the day. Such single-mindedness will be needed by all the players I’ll be cheering on, if we are to be successful. Old cliché I know, but you go to Wembley to win and this is what I want and believe Tottenham Hotspur can achieve against Chelsea. http://www.soccerphile.com/soccerphile/columnists/andy-greeves.html Bet with Bet 365 World Soccer News Soccer betting tips Soccer Books & DVDs Tags Soccer News soccer football J-League K-League Betting

It has been a rare treat for the used and abused football fan to see the Premier League so humiliated as they have been this past week. The seemingly invincible money-machine that was born in 1993 has for the first time hit a real brick wall in its quest to rob football of all its traditions in the pursuit of profit. I have relished watching those whom the PL thought were their friends - the FA, Manchester United etc, turn tail and slam their colonial project. For challenging their authority, the upstart division's pretensions of grandeur have met a cannonade of criticism from the real powers in the game, who have torpedoed the ludicrous 'Game 39' proposal. Hopefully now it will sink to the bottom and die next Thursday when PL Chief Executive Richard Scudamore and FA Chairman Lord Triesman come up against FIFA boss Sepp Blatter in Zurich. Should the PL persist with their daft and ill-conceived plan, FIFA will again lock swords with the PL at their Executive Meeting on the 14th of March and then at their general Congress on the 29th of May. By then, England's World Cup bid will be in the shadow, the last thing the FA wants. Blatter has been implacably opposed to the idea, digging the knife in by saying it would harm England's 2018 World Cup bid. For all the Swiss' cronyism, corporate selling-out and Machiavellian machinations since 1998, he is my hero now for telling the Premier League where to go. Driving a wedge between them and the FA and engaging the fans by threatening to lose England the World Cup was the perfect tactic. Attacking your opponent's weaknesses with your strengths is straight from The Art of War. Blatter seems to have finally twigged that the marriage between football and commerce, which FIFA ran along with for the past decade, will end in tears as the game will sell its soul for good. After presiding over an amazing corporate takeover of the World Cup, his recent pronouncements have been more vociferous than ever in defence of the international game and protecting the national identity of domestic leagues from the money-men. At the same time as welcoming Brazil as hosts for the 2014 World Cup, he rebuked the five-times winners for exporting so many footballers around the world and told them to stay at home. The question is whether these are genuine threats or mere desperate rantings of a man who has lost control of his children. Should 'Game 39' disappear quietly into the shadows, the Premier League only has itself to blame for not canvassing more support behind the scenes before it presented its plan to the world. The idea also had a fatal flaw - adding an extra game instead of playing an early-season and thus relatively meaningless regular season fixture overseas, as the NFL did recently in London. They should content themselves with overseas friendlies and defer graciously now England's World Cup bid is in danger. Of course, as well all now know beyond question, the interests of the English national team and the whole of the nation's fans are quite opposed to those of the Premier League. Next Thursday, I want Blatter to blow the Premiership out of the water. (c) Sean O'Conor & Soccerphile Bet with Bet 365 World Soccer News Soccer betting tips Soccer Books & DVDs Tags Soccer News soccer football J-League K-League Betting

"I firmly believe that the England squad will soon be back to their usual great results" Not the words of a stand-up comic, but the actual testimony of a certain Jose Mourinho, ruling himself out of the England job, while throwing the expected sardines from the trawler, which doubtless kept his PR men happy. 'Usual great results'? England..! You can't fault Jose for his sense of fun. To any seasoned observer, the former Chelsea and Porto coach was never a true contender for England manager anyway and was merely using his alleged interest as leverage for a real top job. Mourinho has far bigger fish to fry, and will in all probability pitch up by February at the helm of one of Italy or Spain's top teams. Milan, for one, are said to be ready to dispense with Carlo Ancelotti and then offer his post to Mourinho early in 2008. Now that the opinionated Portuguese has finally ruled himself out of the running for the FA's top job once and for all, can we have an apology from The News of the World for splashing an absurd front page scoop that Mourinho was gung ho for the England job, or a mea culpa from the nation's bookmakers, who laughably installed him as the favourite to win, please? No commentator with sense would have seriously entertained the idea of Jose Mourinho becoming England manager with his particular media ego, a desire for day to day jousting that could only have been sated every few months, plus a desire for success that the three lions would have struggled to satisfy. England just does not tick those boxes for Jose or for many talented coaches out there. A game and media coverage every few monthsn and the inheritance of one of the most mediocre records in international soccer hardly gets the blood of the continent's top managers racing. So it is that the leading three candidates now are unemployed coaches in search of a new challenge. Fabio Capello, despite his shortcomings, now appears to be in the driving seat, although expect a late surge from Jurgen Klinsmann, if he promises to relocate to England from California. (c) Sean O'Conor & Soccerphile Bet with Bet 365 World Soccer News Soccer betting tips Soccer Books & DVDs Tags Soccer News soccer football J-League K-League Betting

According to the Italian sports daily Gazetto dello Sport quoting an interview with the BBC, ex-Real Madrid, Juventus, Roma and AC Milan boss, Fabio Capello, would like to take on the vacant England manager's job.

Disturbing Durban Draw: Oh no, England vs Croatia again!? An unpleaseant realization for England and Croatia: these teams will meet each other again in the European zone of the 2010 World Cup qualifiers! The whimsical Lady Luck decided that competing alongside England and Croatia in the Group 6 will be Ukraine, Belarus, Kazahstan and Andorra. The draw has not amused the English fans, with the wound inflicted by Croatia very fresh, but the trips to Kiev, Minsk and Almaty cannot be pleasant either. Ukraine, the quarterfinalists of the last World Cup, have had a meagre Euro qualifying campaign, but cannot be easily dismissed, specially in the early stages of the new qualification cycle. The odd Belarus side proved capable of losing at home to Luxembourg, winless for ages, but also of defeating Holland on the last day of the competition. Kazahstan offer more of the same uncertainty: the Asians kicked out Serbia from Euro by beating them 2-1 last March. They will also naturally want to avenge Englishman's Sacha Baron Cohen's massive insult dealt upon the whole nation through the infamous movie featuring Borat, one of Cohen's alteregos.

"There are not many candidates because it looks a bit like a crocodile that opens the mouth and says: 'Jump into that.' Once he's in there, he's eaten. And once you have eaten four, five says: 'No, maybe I don't jump in there.'" So went the words of Arsene Wenger, the best coach working in England at present. In the old days, before the savaging of Bobby Robson and Graham Taylor by the tabloids and the realization that the real money and chances of success were to be found in the Premier League and not the international game, the nation’s best coach would have leapt at the chance of managing England.

The Emperor has no clothes and it’s official. For the first time within the walls of the awesome citadel that is the new Wembley Stadium, the English national team has come a cropper in a big way, and this time there can be no hiding from the naked truth.